“MY TURN” by Gary Seiden

Is there a finite amount of grief in this world,

that when fully felt by one, becomes available

for use by another? It seems to be

endless, but always dissipating,

even from the very beginning.

So perhaps,

like so many other things, we are only

guardians of this grief for a given amount of

time, and then someone


shoulders the burden.

Otherwise I think we’d go

(quite) mad with the constant sorrow, and

never allow the sun to shine again,

or love to reappear, as it always,



Gary Seiden

Photo by Alexis Rhone Fancher

All Rights Reserved

© 2009

In loving memory…rest in peace Gary


  1. lkthayer · January 1, 2010

    Amazing, lovely, sensitive & wise, thank you. LK

  2. Adesh Kaur · January 1, 2010

    O perfect end of the year poem by Gary Seiden and photo of joy by Alexis Rhone Fancher. Thank you. “… love to reappear, as it always, eventually does.”

  3. Linda Bishop · January 1, 2010

    On the day after Christmas, I walked. The sun, bright and warm, made the asphalt sparkle and the grass look greener than usual. As I put one foot in front of the other, my mind went backwards and I thought of people who had left me for now. There was sorrow because cracks left by grief will close with time, but never fully reseal. But the sadness was more of a whisper than a scream, and I was grateful for the way we’re made–built to be resiliant and survive. This poem captures exactly what I felt and the image by Alexis shows all of us what life is meant to be.

  4. Constancia! · January 2, 2010

    Wow…what an interesting concept that we borrow grief for a time and then it moves on…although the shadow if it never quite leaves. Your poem is beautifully written and yet, another reminder, that we must “carpe diem” each moment…each minute…each hour…each day and each year.
    Thank you!

  5. Constancia! · January 2, 2010

    P.S. Great concept to pair Alexis’s picture with the poem!

  6. yolanda · January 2, 2010

    Positive to know there is a light ahead.

  7. odonnellgallery · January 2, 2010

    What a beautiful way to express the unexpresible.


  8. Jaymie · January 2, 2010

    What an amazing capture. We share it all because all would be too much for one. Beautiful.

  9. Kalliope Amorphous · January 3, 2010


  10. Alexis Rhone Fancher · January 8, 2010

    You shine a brilliant light, dear friend. It warms my heart.

  11. Roz Levine · March 25, 2011

    I can’t believe I missed this poem when it was originally published.
    It’s so beautiful and moving and a guiding light by which to lead one’s life.

  12. Leah Sullivan · March 25, 2011

    Death has a big jaw, but it cannot swallow the sincerity of character reflected in this man’s words, or the depth of living he enjoyed.

  13. Marcus · March 26, 2011

    “Guardians of the grief.” Didn’t now this man but he left a great poem to friendship, to holding each other dear, as we pass around the grief glove.

  14. H. Green · March 26, 2011

    This is perfect poetry – Any words I may add would only diminish this beautiful expression. I’m moved, particularly in light of Gary’s own passing.
    Grieve friends – But not for too long.

  15. Lynne Williamson · March 26, 2011

    Very beautiful.

  16. Lynn Gibson · February 18, 2012

    Love does reappear and the feeling of dishonest betrayal by the ones we once loved for 25 years really does go away. The burden does go to someone else’s shoulders as we go on with our lives not looking back at the destruction we have left behind. Just like Gary.

    • Marcia (his first wife) · October 27, 2014

      I could not have said it better. “The burden does go to someone else’s shoulders as we go on with our lives not looking back at the destruction we have left behind. Just like Gary.”

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