On Fridays we wear fedoras and go down to the Crow’s Nest. The ocean view reminds the Captain of Key West, or as he calls it, “Kayo Waso.” I order him the tempura prawns and a glass of chardonnay. As soon as we’re seated, I watch his pale blue eyes following the young waitresses in their short skirts and high heels.
“Nice atmosphere!” the Captain shouts at me across the table. Then his eyes dart back to the tan legs and red lips.
“Sure is, pal.”
“I’m hungry!” he says, as if it’s an amazing discovery.
“How convenient, I just ordered you the prawns.”
“The frogs?”
“The PRAWNS!”
“I don’t have any fucking idea of what he just said. I’m all fucked up.” He makes eye contact with me. “I’m sorry, I was just talking to myself, not to you.”
“That’s okay, Captain. I ORDERED YOU THE P-R-A-W-N-S.”
“Didn’t you just fucking say that?”
“I did. I thought you didn’t hear me.”
“What?”
I start to explain again, until I notice the Captain’s grin sneaking out from under his bone-white mustache.
“You heard me, didn’t you?”
His smile confirms my suspicion. “WOOOOOOOP WOOOOOP WOOOOOOO!” he hoots. “She has a nice leg, WOOOOP WOOOOP!”
I follow his eyes to a waitress at the table next to ours.
“Good news, pal: it’s got a twin.” I laugh.
“I’m a dirty old man. Well, just call me DOM then,” he says, taking a sip of his wine. “I’m hungry!”
“Good, I ordered you the prawns.”
“The who?”
© 2011
The Juice Bar 
Very heartwarming.
I can confirm, It was a nice leg 🙂
I miss the Captain and I’ve never met him. Very nice. Jim
Genuine.
love the part about the leg’s twin! illuminating to see the humor and patience you bring to situations that would be maddening for most other people. usually when i hear or read about alzheimer’s, it’s portrayed as a sad and ugly beast. you paint a very different portrait. thanks for that.
Love the dialogue, these two are quite the pair.
what a wonderful anecdote! it reminds me of spending time with my grandmother, and encapsulates so beautifully the bittersweet comedy of it all. thanks for sharing 🙂
Beautiful writing, my man. It brings forth a taste of everything from frustration, to exacerbation, humor, and sympathy. Also a strong desire to dig into a plate of prawns and some chardonnay!